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It seems like forever since I have played Eve Online, and to be honest, it is coming up on a full month already.  My internet provider should (ahem.. SHOULD) be contacting me sometime today or tomorrow to schedule my reinstallation of fiber.

Here’s to hoping.

Nevertheless, now that I am without Internet I had to find various things to keep me and my mind busy.

New Task #1:  Reading – Yes, this was a fun pasttime of sorts.  I picked up the Game of Thrones series (well, the first four books) and burned through them rather quickly.  The problem with that?  I live in podunk and I can’t find the fifth book.. and also the sixth and seventh aren’t even out yet.  No problem, I’ll just log into Amazon… oh, wait…

New Task #2:  Move – Yes, I moved to a new place.  Which means new things to learn and do.  Those things to learn are a.) how to deal with back pain, and b.) how to move heavy stuff again, and again, and again..

New Task #3: Mow – Yes, not just mow.. but mow the equivalent of a football field.. every week.  Have I told you how much I think that riding lawnmowers are a man’s best friend?

New Task #4:  Threaten The Hot Big Burny Thing in the Sky – Now that I have lots of extra time on my hands, I subsequently felt the need to exercise and train up so that I may battle my nemesis, the EVIL, LIGHT, BURNING MONSTER THAT FORCES ME TO WAKE AND SEE THE WORLD AROUND ME!!  Course, my exercise thus far is standing on the porch admiring the view while sipping ice cold water from my new fridge.  I did take off my shirt to bare my manly muscles in defiance.. but this did little other than force its wraith against me by giving me a nasty sunburn.

New Task #5:  Gardening – As much as I hate to admit this.. gardening is actually rather fun.  I particularly enjoy weeding.  I dunno about you, but I like to pretend like I am some evil superbeast who pulls innocent weed people out of their homes to slowly bake in the furnace of light.  I even think that I can hear them screaming and trying to run away on their roots.  To me that makes it all the more fun to rip them out..  My 13 year old clearly doesn’t have the same joy in it that I do.  He doesn’t even get the manaical laugh…

New Task #6:  Learning to use the Pool and Jacuzzi Care – Just jump in right?  Well.. turns out that is only true if you are a.) a kid, or b.) not the owner.  I am learning a lot about pool dynamics.  Most of them involve me NOT being in the pool, but being just outside of it.. getting dirty and spending money.

New Task #7:  Teaching the Kids to Use the Remote – This has become my new task ever since I realized that, now with a TV in the bedroom, all of my kids no longer wish to watch TV on the big screen, or in the kitchen, or even in the living room.  The current excuse for this problem is that my children do not know how to operate a remote.  I didn’t believe it at first, but when I give them the remote.. they push random buttons and shake it at the TV like they are Harry Potter.  My wife, who isn’t a computer expert, appears to be able to do complex math and physics problems as well as any number of genius level calculations with that very same remote.  How did I get stuck teaching the kids?  Because I like to sleep.

New Task #8:  Yard Sales/Antiquing – Antique Roadshow, Pawn Stars, Storage Wars, as well as any other number of programs on TV belie the true joy that you can get from going through other people’s unnecessary items.  Seriously.  You get some good deals from people who just want to get rid of their stuff and who are willing to let it go cheaply just so they don’t have to move it any more (see New Task #2).  Out of this, my wife and I have picked up two new hobbies: 1.) an affinity for boats and sailing, and 2.) artistic glassware.

New Task #9:  Hobbies – As I mentioned before, both my lovely wife and I want to learn to sail.  However, we have a slight, teeny-tiny problem.  We get sea-sick.  Rather easily.  So, in the mean time we collect old sailing gear and ocean related stuff, in the hope that their “oceaniness” will rub off on us, and we can kiss our seasickness goodbye forever.  We can dream.

New Task #10: Art – The other thing we get into is artistic glassware.  Its inexpensive and looks great.  Plus, with our new place, the sun makes the glassware shine.  It makes my girl smile, so its a good thing.

New Task #11: Get beat at Halo/DC versus Mortal Combat/Etc. Repeatly – If there is one skill that Eve Online has taught me, it is that nothing is as it seems.  It could be easy, or it could be harder than it looks.  However, that always requires me to sit back and evaluate my position.  Halo is not a game for people who sit back and evaluate their position.  It is a game where you run, jump, and shoot everyone as fast as you can before you get killed and T-bagged.  Fortunately, my son hasn’t figured out T-Bagging yet.

New Task #12:  Return the favor via RPG Shooters – Fallout, Borderlands, etc. DO reward those players who think about their tactics and strategy, so it is rather fun that to see my son spend a couple hours trying to shoot his way into a place only to die over and over again.  Whereas, I just go up and say “Hi” and they let me in…  Kids today, no respect.

Well, that’s all I can think of right now that I have tried since I don’t have an internet connection up at home.. if I figure on anything more, I’ll let ya know.

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